Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Thought This Was Funny.....

Poem to MOM
My son came home from school one day,
With a smirk upon his face.
He decided he was smart enough,
To put me in my place..

'Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that's taught by Mr. Wright?
It's all about the laws today,
The 'Children's Bill of Rights.'

It says I need not clean my room,
Don't have to cut my hair
No one can tell me what to think,
Or speak, or what to wear.

I have freedom from religion,
And regardless what you say,
I don't have to bow my head,
And I sure don't have to pray.

I can wear earrings if I want,
And pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
Get tattoos from head to toe.

And if you ever spank me,
I'll charge you with a crime.
I'll back up all my charges,
With the marks on my behind.

Don't you ever touch me,
My body's only for my use,
Not for your hugs and kisses,
that's just more child abuse.

Don't preach about your morals,
Like your Mama did to you.
That's nothing more than mind control,
And it's illegal too!

Mom, I have these children's rights,
So you can't influence me,
Or I'll call Children's Services Division,
Better known as C.S.D.'

Mom's Reply and Thoughts

Of course my first instinct was
To toss him out the door.
But the chance to teach him a lesson
Made me think a little more.

I mulled it over carefully,
I couldn't let this go.
A smile crept upon my face,
he's messing with a pro.

Next day I took him shopping
At the local Goodwill Store.
I told him, 'Pick out all you want,
there's shirts & pants galore..

I've called and checked with C.S.D ...
Who said they didn't care
If I bought you K-Mart shoes
Instead of those Nike Airs.

I've canceled that appointment
To take your driver's test.
The C..S.D. Is unconcerned
So I'll decide what's best. '

I said 'No time to stop and eat,
Or pick up stuff to munch.
And tomorrow you can start to learn
To make your own sack lunch.

Just save the raging appetite,
And wait till dinner time.
We're having liver and onions,
A favorite dish of mine.'

He asked 'Can I please rent a movie,
To watch on my VCR?'
'Sorry, but I sold your TV,
For new tires on my car.

I also rented out your room,
You'll take the couch instead.
The C .S.D. Requires
Just a roof over your head.

Your clothing won't be trendy now,
I'll choose what we eat.
That allowance that you used to get,
Will buy me something neat.

I'm selling off your jet ski,
Dirt-bike & roller blades.
Check out the 'Parents Bill of Rights',
It's in effect today!

Hey hot shot, are you crying,
Why are you on your knees?
Are you asking God to help you out,
Instead of C.S.D..?'

MOM (Mean Old Mother)

LOL....LOVE this!

20 comments:

Becky Fyfe said...

Love it! :)

my family said...

hi my name is april and I found you through welcome wednesday so glad I found your blog. Stop by and visit when you can

Unknown said...

I read this several years ago and absolutely love it! Your blog brought back alot of memories :)

Simplegirl said...

Following your fan page. Thank you for stopping by, have a great day!

Leslie said...

Congrats on the feature! haha, that poem is hilarious. I'm your newest follwer!
(I'm a mark girl)

Jackie said...

Love it!

ElizOF said...

This poem is hysterical! What a riot and that it rhymes beautifully too. I love it!
Happy Welcome Wednesday!
Elizabeth

Joan said...

Cute! And congrats on all your new follows! =)

Helene said...

I. love. it.

Donna said...

Too funny! Found you through SITS, in case you're wondering.

citymouse said...

This is awesome! I have 5 sons aged 15 and higher and boy I can tell you there's been days I wish I could have said these same thoughts!

Stopping by from SITS.

Jane said...

I so love this! Liver and onions, yum! I better develop some kind of liking to it before my daughter turns into a teenager.

Avital Chicago Limousine said...

The poem is funny but it is beautiful..

Aleksandra Nearing said...

Haha - love it! I dread the teenage years...hope I can raise mine right!

Kyrstin said...

I love it!!

Anonymous said...

Awesome site, I had not noticed adventures-in-mommy-land.blogspot.com earlier in my searches!
Carry on the great work!

Eastlyn and co. said...

With one teenager in the house and soon to be another, I'll have to keep this handy. Always worth repeating as kids think they know so much *smile* (BTW, thanks for your e-mail)

Dianne_momstuff said...

I am glad I found your blog. I am followinf here and on face book. Come and Like my FB page. You have the kind of posts I want to share.
Mom-stuff Interests page http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/mom-stuff/128036077231350?ref=sgm
Thanks Dianne

Angela said...

I just popped over from Helene's blog and love this poem! I want to check out your recipes, hoping they're for a big family! Can't wait to read more!

Emmy said...

This is awesome! Too funny...and something I will need someday I am sure